People are always asking me, “Mikolai, how can I lead a creative + relevant + highly lucrative freelance writing career such as yours?” I usually reply something stupid like, “Dude, I drink several coffees and Red Bulls a day, live on 5 hours sleep and will be dead by 50.”

Later, I’ll forward them the document below. It’s a beginner’s guide to pitching articles. It’s all true. Whether or not it’s helpful is another matter.

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Okay, the easiest way to get started is to decide what you want to write and who you want to write for. What I normally do is go to the newsagent, buy my favourite mags (ones I want to write for), go to a cafe, drink A LOT of coffee and flick through the mags taking notes about article ideas. The coffee is important to this process. At the end of this I might 4-5 potential articles I can pitch.

If you don’t have a lot of material published in other mags and are starting out then simply emailing an editor and going ‘I’d like to write about this’ is not gonna work. Basically, you’re going to have to write the article and shop it around. Or at the very least, write half the article and send it to editors as a sample. If the article idea is interesting and you can write then they’ll get back to you. Or maybe they won’t. Point is, the easier you can make their job the better your chances – if the mag is going to print and the editor needs to fill a page quickly having your completed article ready to use can be a real lifesaver.

On the above note, I guess it’s sort of a given that you should be familiar with their general tone and try to stay within those parameters. This can be harder than it seems. I once spent a week at a ‘lads mag’ and they HATED ME so bad and rewrote all my copy

Most editors will ignore you. If I send out pitches to ten editors then I might hear back from 3-4. And maybe one of those will be interested in an article. Keep harassing them. I had several ideas rejected by Penthouse before they finally liked something.

Let’s see, oh, a good subject heading in your email can help. Something to grab peoples’ attention. Sometimes I like to be an asshole and write shit like ‘Super Awesome Mega Pitch’, but that really comes down to the market.

If all else fails, you can try mailing a magazine. As in, physical mail. Follow-up an email with a hand written letter and a print out of your article. It might not get used, but you’ll stand out from all the other people sending emails.

Stalk people. I go to all these shitty awesome art launches in Melbourne because it’s a good way to meet people who work in publishing / media and once you’ve met in real life it’s much harder for them to ignore your emails.

Okay, that’s all I can think of right now. Basically, you gotta keep harassing people until they crack. Do it enough and you might end up with enough freelance work to sit at home in a bathrobe drinking coffee and writing about stuff.